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So what am I doing post retirement? Did you know I retired? I did, just this summer. Its funny I always wanted to have freedom 45. I assumed at which point I'd leave the Air Force and go fly for the Airlines. It seemed like a great retirement gig. Buuut instead I retired at 40. It looks good on paper but thats a crummy story for another day. Once about five years ago I was talking to my pain Psychologist and he said whats the dream? We used to talk about this a lot. We focused the dream down to ' I wake up in the morning, put my children on the bus, I go swim or paddle board, and then peacefully write my blog while drinking coffee.' Not a bad morning plan hey? I think I'm actually getting that down, with a few exceptions. 1. Wake up put children on bus. The children are much quieter in my vision, always have their hair brushed and matching socks. And the bus doesn't actually come down our road. We have to drive up or walk to the main road. The intersections are much too dangerous for the school bus to turn or even stop, so instead its ok for my three children to walk a mile up with no sidewalks on a double blind high collision hill? Thanks, we'll pass. We're still working on dealing with post Ben PTSD. There's not enough Ativan in the world for us to do that walk. 2. The paddle board thing is lovely, but only when I have someone to carry it, and I also seem to have overlooked that whole temperature change thing in Canada, lol. I do love paddle boarding. Usually I sit and Lily paddles me about. It's actually quite lovely until Henry gets upset and he has to come with us too. Then I'm basically sitting with a wet dog in my lap while a small human erratically paddles us about. I am thinking of getting an indoor bike for the cooler days. So that part of the dream is kind of coming into focus. Isn't it funny how my vision had no sound, temperature or cat hair. 3. I sit down with coffee and write my blog. Hmmm, well how has that been going, lol? To be honest its really hard to start. Two kittens are currently bouncing around my living room in an ultra-kitten-battle-royale. It is not overrated, lol. Every time I blog I get to this point where I feel like I can't be truthful anymore. I feel like it will make people sad, or I wanted to talk about the military, my experiences, just honest truthful things. Well, guess who's free to talk now?!
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